Being on edge in your own head is an awful experience. It can range anywhere from feeling uncomfortable to being downright scary.
Thankfully though, there are some things you can do to lessen the discomfort. Here are some tips that—when practiced regularly—can boost your mood, and help you become more emotionally resilient overall.
Get Help From a Mental Health Professional
It’s worth noting right off the top that if what you’re feeling becomes really overwhelming or dominates most of your day, it’s important to seek help. The longer the feelings persist, the more disruptive they may become.
Though it may feel incredibly isolating, anxiety is actually quite common. Those who struggle with it to the point where it interferes with their quality of life get the best results by seeing a therapist.
If you’re a Northern California resident who’s interested in pursuing therapy or learning more about what the process entails, we’re here to help. The Relationship Therapy Center provides counseling in both Roseville and Fair Oaks, and are here for you whenever you need us.
Be Present
Most anxiety is rooted in thoughts about the future. Our minds go into overdrive whirring and ruminating over potential scenarios that could happen, and the body reacts as if it’s actually happening, releasing stress hormones such as cortisol.
This is where practicing mindfulness can really help. Mindfulness is rooted in the present moment, and a big part of mindfulness practice reinforces that you’re safe now—never mind the worries about what could happen.
We can’t control the future, and no matter how much we worry about a situation, worrying doesn’t change the outcome.
But… we can control our breath.
We can slow down our thoughts.
We can focus on one thing at a time, focus on coming back to the present moment.
We can let go of the desire to follow our thoughts, redirect our minds to a more peaceful place.
Change the Environment
One powerful way to boost your mood is to mix up your environment. Head outside for a long walk, or go to the gym.
Take note of how you’re feeling before the activity—you’re probably going to feel quite resistant to doing the activity—and then check back in after, once it’s complete.
Chances are that after you’ve done the activity, you’ll feel much, much better.
Sunlight, fresh air, and movement are all incredibly powerful natural mood boosters. The trick lies in actually doing them, which is usually the biggest challenge.
Spending time with people you care about is another way to uplift your mood.
Sharing what you’ve been going through with someone you love and trust is a wonderful way to come back to the present, and feel less alone.
Separate Self from Situation
There are times where disappointment over not getting a job you were excited about or suffering a painful breakup can completely take the wind out of your sails and leave you feeling extremely low.
In these moments the inner critic—you know, the voice of not being good enough, young enough, whatever enough—will dominate. It will pile right on top of whatever anguish you’re already experiencing, making it even more overwhelming and painful.
Here’s where it’s incredibly important to separate you—your inherent worth and lovability and light as a human being—from the situation. Not being chosen for something in no way diminishes your light. It doesn’t devalue you; it says NOTHING about your worthiness. Failing at something or not being chosen does not mean that you are a failure or a reject. It happens to everyone, it’s a part of life.
There will be another opportunity for you out there, and when you’re feeling stronger, there may be a lesson to be learned from the overall experience.
Disrupt ANTS
Just like creepy-crawly ants have the ability to rally the troops and storm your kitchen, so too do Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTS) which can easily cause chaos in our minds.
These thoughts are spontaneous and negative, and without us being consciously aware of them—you know how it is when thoughts are just there, running in a loop in the background—they can cast a shadow over the day before we even realize what’s going on.
In order to get rid of these thoughts and the anxiety and worry they cause, you have to notice them.
They may arrive in the form of pessimism, all or nothing thinking, jumping to negative conclusions, magnifying negative events and minimizing positives, constantly judging yourself and feeling like you’re not measuring up, and not applying logic or reason to your thinking.
Once you notice your thoughts, it’s important to have an antidote. This can be a visual of a stop sign, preventing them from moving forward. Or you can picture capturing them into a jar, screwing on the lid, and putting them on a shelf for another day.
It’s important to remember that in many cases, what you’re thinking isn’t even true, and thus you’re letting your mood and day be affected by something that has no basis in reality.
If you’re struggling to reframe negative thoughts, this is a skill a therapist can help you with.
Again, the key lies in noticing the thoughts, and calling it out—disrupting the pattern—when it occurs. It may feel cumbersome and tedious at first, and you also may be shocked at how often your thoughts take a turn for the negative.
Old patterns are hard to break, and our minds are wired to focus on perceived threats. But, as you keep redirecting the mind, each day you’ll find yourself needing to do it less and less.
The more you learn to manage your mind and create a more positive inner space, the less chance your mind has to run amok and end up managing you.
And don’t forget, if you need us, we’re just a phone call away.
Therapy in Roseville, CA, Fair Oaks, CA, or Online in California:
If you are ready to change for the better, we can help. Our therapists are ready to support you in your journey towards creating a healthy and happy lifestyle. To begin counseling in Roseville, CA area, or counseling in Fair Oaks, please follow these three simple steps:
- 1. Contact our counseling office to get more information about what therapy would be best for you and to schedule a free consultation.
- 2. Make an appointment with one of our highly trained therapists
- 3. Find support and healing in your life!
Services Offered at The Relationship Therapy Center in California:
Our Sacramento area counseling clinics located in Roseville, CA and Fair Oaks, CA are pleased to offer a variety of mental health services. Our services include but are not limited to: Couples counseling, counseling after infidelity, sex therapy, co-parent counseling, family therapy, divorce counseling, intensive couples retreats, and premarital counseling. Our individual therapy services include, anxiety treatment, therapy for children, teen therapy, depression treatment, and individual relationship counseling. We also offer online counseling to California residents. Please contact our office to learn more about the many ways we can help you and your loved ones.