How To Be Resilient

No matter who you are or what you have, life requires one thing from all of us: Resilience. 

According to the Marriam-Webster dictionary, resilience is defined as, an ability to recover from or adjust easily to misfortune or change.

Who hasn’t needed to be resilient? 

For a quick refresher, think back to 2020 when resilience was required on a global scale.

Resilience is something that all the people you admire have in common, and it’s not limited to just them. 

Thus, if you find setbacks, change, and other forces outside your control hard to recover from, take heart: Becoming more resilient is something you can learn how to do, too. 

Before we get started, it’s important to note that being resilient doesn’t reduce the pain of losing a loved one. It doesn’t wipe away the worry that comes along with a new diagnosis. It doesn’t take the sting away from tragedy and heartbreak. 

What it does is empower you. It gives you authorization to consciously choose how to move forward, despite the setbacks, the bad news, the things not going according to plan. 

Like a muscle, when practiced intentionally throughout your life, resilience is what keeps you going and growing. 

Here are some tips that can help you meet some of life’s challenges with resilience, and allow you to learn and grow throughout the process:

You are Not Your Thoughts

For better or worse (unfortunately it’s usually the latter) many of us tend to accept our thoughts as The Truth. Especially when thoughts elicit an emotional reaction which makes them feel even more powerful and harder to ignore. It’s hard not to see thoughts as truth when the feeling’s there – heavy as a ton of exclamation points – adding emphasis.

Take a moment to consider this: We come from a long line of negative thinkers.  Evolution demands it. Predators, food scarcity, being ousted from the tribe… those were all very real threats that had to be in the forefront of our ancestors’ minds. They had to focus on the ‘negative.’ Their survival depended upon it.

Now, things have changed, but our brains’ penchant for worry and survival-based negativity hasn’t.

Thus, we’re stuck believing that losing a job, getting broken up with, worrying about the future means we’re a failure. Rejected and undesirable; basically doomed.

Guess what? None of this is true! None of it is true. 

Nothing and nobody, no single institution or person gets to determine your worth or value as a human. 

Many of these negative thoughts are likely picked up from society, a parent or caregiver at a young age, a situation where you may have been bullied, whatever.

Take the time to examine the things and behaviors that are limiting you from expanding yourself and embracing life in the ways you dream. 

Failing isn’t a big deal. Many people are so afraid of it because they think it means they are a failure. It’s simply not true.

Examine Past Challenges

Take a moment to reflect on other challenges you faced. How were you able to move past them? What did you learn about yourself in the process? Try not to be dismissive of yourself and sell yourself short. The fact of the matter is, if you’re reading this, you’ve overcome a ton already.

This Too Shall Pass

Negative emotions have a way of getting way too comfortable. At least that’s how it feels: they’ve established residency, there’s no way to evict them, this is how it’s going to be.

Again, not true. The makeup of most hard-to-handle feelings and emotions is intensity in the worst way possible. But it’s fleeting. It will pass. Just like trying situations. 

And while the pain of loss is never “gotten over,” after time it scootches over to make some room for other feelings and experiences. Yes, even joy. 

Seek Support

It’s important to get support. You want to support yourself by being honest and kind. Don’t be dismissive, and again, don’t misinterpret a rejection or failure to mean that YOU are a reject or failure. 

Supporting yourself includes eating well, getting enough rest, and finding time to move your body.

Additionally, seeking support from trusted friends and loved ones is always helpful. If you think you could use guidance from a therapist, they are an excellent resource. If you want to learn more about how therapy can help, please. Give us a text or call.

Begin Anxiety Treatment in Roseville, CA, Fair Oaks, CA, or Online in California:

If you are ready to find relief from your anxiety, we can help. The therapists at the Relationship Therapy Center provide anxiety treatment to help teens and adults find happiness and live without the pain of anxiety. To begin therapy at our Sacramento area locations or online, follow these steps:

• Contact the Relationship Therapy Center and schedule a free 20-minute phone consultation to learn more about anxiety treatment,

• Meet with one of our talented therapists

• Begin anxiety treatment and regain control in your life.

Other Services Offered at The Relationship Therapy Center in California:

In addition to anxiety therapy, Our Sacramento area counseling clinics located in Roseville and Fair Oaks, CA are pleased to offer a variety of mental health services. Our couples services include: Couples Counseling, Counseling after infidelity, sex therapy, co-parent counseling, family therapy, divorce counseling, intensive couples retreats, and premarital counseling. Our individual therapy services include anxiety treatment, therapy for children, teen therapy, depression treatment, codependency counseling and individual relationship counseling. Our therapists offer online counseling in California to treat a variety of mental health concerns. Please reach out to our Sacramento area therapy office to learn more about the many ways we can help you or your loved ones.