If you feel like your relationship is falling apart you have two choices: The first is to ignore what’s happening, cross your fingers and hope it gets better.
The second is to go to couple’s counseling.
These decisions are not created equally, however. One leads to a much better outcome than the other. Here’s what happens if your relationship is falling apart… and you choose to do nothing.
What Happens When You Don’t Work on Your Relationship?
Since your relationship is a significant aspect of your life, when it suffers YOU suffer. Yet often, working on the issues that crop up in relationships is not a priority. There are school lunches to pack, kids to drop off, a full day at the office to attend to… most people are busy from dawn to dusk.
However, by failing to address those little issues that start to arise in the relationship, they tend to fester. Then more appear. You grow distant, there may be some form of infidelity, and the closeness that once felt unbreakable dissolves.
The longer you exist in this state, the harder it is to come back from.
What Percentage of Couples Regret Getting Divorced?
Divorce is the obvious answer for most people who choose not to go to therapy and
research shows 33-50% of divorced couples experience remorse, with some studies indicating 68% of people regret their decision to divorce.
Divorce tears families apart. It’s devastating for children to endure and it’s heartbreaking when people realize that it could have been fixed, but now it’s too late. It is also expensive!
What is it About Marriage Therapy That Makes it so Effective?
Here’s the truth: most people are not as self-aware as they think they are. Often, there are unhealthy behavioral patterns, thought processes, and communication tactics at play. Trauma and other life experiences can cloud how we interact with and perceive the world around us.
A therapist is able to look at the big picture. As a neutral non-judgmental third party trained in human behavior and relationship dynamics, they’re able to immediately suss out the cause of the friction.
A therapist will guide the two of you along in a safe supportive atmosphere.
When there are kids involved, you owe it to them (and yourselves!) to try and work on the relationship before rushing to divorce. Save for abusive behavior, most issues couples face are pure misunderstanding, and many couples emerge from therapy thrilled because their relationship is better than ever.
What Happens if We Choose to Divorce After Going to Therapy?
If, even after therapy it turns out that the damage is irreversible or the two of you are truly no longer compatible, the therapeutic process will have still provided ample insight into who you are and what your needs are in a relationship.
Additionally, if there are kids involved, therapy can help you and your ex discuss how you plan on coparenting and set the foundation for a healthy dynamic between the two of you.
Often, people tend to terminate relationships with no real insight into what really went wrong, and why. The end result is diving blindly into another relationship, and more often than not, without the self-awareness gleaned from therapy, that one’s doomed to fail as well.
If your relationship is hurting, do yourself a favor and sign up for couples counseling.
At the Relationship Therapy Center our team of skilled compassionate experts are available 7-days a week to help accommodate busy schedules, so really, there’s no room for excuses. Therapy is an investment of time and finances, but it is often worth it. Give us a call today to learn more about how we can help.
Begin Couples Counseling in the Sacramento Area:
If you are ready to learn how to deal with the problems in your relationship, the therapists at The Relationship Therapy Center in Fair Oaks, CA and Roseville, CA can help! Our therapists are ready to support you and your partner in your journey towards creating a healthy and happy relationship. To begin marriage counseling in Roseville, CA area, or marriage counseling in Fair Oaks, please follow these three simple steps:
- Contact our counseling office to get more information about couples counseling and to schedule a free consultation.
- Make an appointment with one of our Gottman Method trained therapists.
- Find support and healing in your relationship!
Other Services Offered at The Relationship Therapy Center in California:
In addition to couples counseling, Our Sacramento area counseling clinics located in Roseville and Fair Oaks, CA are pleased to offer a variety of mental health services. Our couples counseling services include: Counseling after infidelity, sex therapy, co-parent counseling, family therapy, divorce counseling, couples therapy retreats, and premarital counseling. Our individual therapy services include, anxiety treatment, trauma therapy, teen therapy, therapy for children, codependency counseling, depression treatment, and individual relationship counseling. We also offer online counseling to California residents. Please contact our office to learn more about the many ways we can help you and your loved ones.