Want to know one of the biggest misconceptions about Valentine’s Day? Many people seem to think that you have to be in a relationship to celebrate it.
The reality is, it doesn’t matter if you’re single or not. This holiday is all about love. And why not show yourself a little, just because? Let’s take a look at some things you can do to show yourself a little extra kindness and TLC this Valentine’s Day.
Now, because everyone’s different, some of these ideas may not appeal to you.
Pick the ones you like, or let them inspire you to turn inward and think about meaningful ways you can give yourself the gift of love, appreciation, and maybe even acceptance this Valentine’s Day.
Give Yourself a Break
Roughly 85% of people worldwide suffer with low self-esteem, which means billions of people worldwide struggle when it comes to self-love.
If you’re unnecessarily hard on yourself, if you berate yourself, hold yourself to a next to impossible standard (and potentially a standard that isn’t even yours to begin with!) here’s a great Valentine’s Day idea: How about you give yourself a break?
Try to just allow yourself to be, sans criticism.
For most people, this is easier said than done. It takes a ton of mental bandwidth to shift your perspective, redirect your thoughts, and sometimes even catch yourself in the act of negative self-talk.
Yet, the world can always use some extra kindness. Start by offering that gift to yourself—it doesn’t cost anything. And if you keep it up, you’ll get the benefit of a happier, more enjoyable life.
Give Yourself What You Need
Often, being an adult can involve telling yourself no, over and over. What’s something you’ve been craving and denying yourself? Perhaps you’d love a massage. Or a burger and fries, then a nap. Maybe it’s all of those.
What if you said YES to yourself and a little indulgence this Valentine’s Day?
What would that look like?
Could you use some extra sleep? A day eating all your favorite foods, then enjoying a candlelit bath with a ton of bubbles and some lemon sorbet?
Depending on personal preferences and obligations, this will look different for everyone. Take some time to plot out what it looks like for you, and give yourself permission to indulge, free of any judgment or guilt.
Write Yourself a Valentine
If the prospect of this makes you squirm and cringe, take that as a sign. You really should do this. Ok, you don’t have to—but at least reflect on the qualities you admire about yourself.
Many people have a hard time with the mere thought of doing this, never mind actually doing it.
Most human beings are burdened with a “negativity bias,” which is why we hyper fixate on every little thing that we believe is wrong with us. You know, that exhausting list of all the things we think make us lesser than and unworthy.
You are just as worthy as everyone of love and care, kindness, understanding and compassion. As you work through the muck and mire to cultivate and understand that, you open yourself up to a whole new experience. An incredible opportunity to give yourself the gift of unconditional love and support.
Of course, this is easier said than done. Most people carry decades worth of social programming, beliefs, and even trauma that ultimately backs them into a corner and diminishes their light.
At the Relationship Therapy Center, our belief is that the key to finding lasting fulfilling relationships starts with you and the relationship you have with yourself. Just as we’re taught to not tolerate abusive toxic behavior from others, the same goes for ourselves. If your internal dialog is so nasty it would get the cops called if anyone heard it, or if you’re struggling with even the thought of being kind to and accepting yourself, consider therapy.
We provide couples counseling and individual counseling in Roseville and Fair Oaks, two convenient Northern California locations. If you think you need it, we’d love to help you discover the transformative power that occurs through mending the relationship you have with yourself.
Therapy in Roseville, CA, Fair Oaks, CA, or Online in California:
If you are ready to change for the better, we can help. Our therapists are ready to support you in your journey towards creating a healthy and happy lifestyle. To begin counseling in Roseville, CA area, or counseling in Fair Oaks, please follow these three simple steps:
- 1. Contact our counseling office to get more information about what therapy would be best for you and to schedule a free consultation.
- 2. Make an appointment with one of our highly trained therapists
- 3. Find support and healing in your life!
Services Offered at The Relationship Therapy Center in California:
Our Sacramento area counseling clinics located in Roseville, CA and Fair Oaks, CA are pleased to offer a variety of mental health services. Our services include but are not limited to: Couples counseling, counseling after infidelity, sex therapy, co-parent counseling, family therapy, divorce counseling, intensive couples retreats, and premarital counseling. Our individual therapy services include, anxiety treatment, therapy for children, teen therapy, depression treatment, and individual relationship counseling. We also offer online counseling to California residents. Please contact our office to learn more about the many ways we can help you and your loved ones.