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Therapy for Children with Big Emotions
As much as people like to romanticize childhood and paint it as this magical time, it can also be scary. For the most part, children have little control over the course of their lives.
Really, the only defense a child has is their emotions, and when you’re little, it’s easy to view the way you feel as fact. It’s so easy to yield to the power of the big feeling.
When a child wants something, the disappointment of being told ‘no’ is real. It can easily morph into a big, explosive emotional outburst.
When parents go out for a date night and leave their child behind, the fear and worry that something could happen to their parents is real. So, naturally, that can also result in an outburst.
Some children have a tougher time than others with big emotions. If your child is anxious or has frequent meltdowns and tantrums, here’s what you need to know.
What Causes Teen Self-Esteem Issues?
Despite being tone deaf, she was the kid at the elementary school Christmas concert who belted out ‘Silent Night’ with all the confidence in the world.
She was the kid who tore around the playground, head high and shoulders back. She wasn’t the fastest or the most agile, but it didn’t matter. She was having fun.
Now? Her shoulders slouch. She’s painfully self-critical. She’s become hyper-focused on appearance and weight.
Of course, this affects you. Watching your child struggle is one of the most painful things a parent can endure.
Luckily, when it comes to self-confidence snags and other stressors in teens, there are ways you can help. Here are some of the common culprits that lurk behind self-esteem issues in teens, and some tips to help them navigate.
What is Emotional Safety in Relationships?
When people start dating, they usually have no idea what they’re doing.
Many people often let attraction inform their decision on whether or not a partner is suitable. It’s easy to understand why that initial chemistry is so alluring and powerful. It makes you feel like those characters in the rom-com movies, so what you’re feeling has to be true love, right?
Not so fast.
As unassuming and (let’s be real here) unsexy as emotional safety sounds, it is a vital pillar to a healthy, loving relationship.
Let’s take a look at what emotional safety in a relationship is, and why it matters so much.
How Is Couples Therapy Different from Individual Therapy for Each of Us?
“I already have my own therapist—do we really need couples therapy too?” It’s a question that comes up a lot, especially among couples in the greater Sacramento area where investing in personal growth through individual therapy is already part of the routine. The short answer: individual therapy and couples therapy do very different things. Your individual therapist is focused on you. In couples therapy and marriage counseling, the relationship itself is the focus—the patterns between you, not just within you. If you’ve been wondering what actually happens in couples therapy and how it’s different from what you’re already doing, here’s what to know.
Why Do Children Need Behavioral Therapy?
You’re at Target with your little sidekick. You just said “no” to a tantalizing endcap displaying pastel Easter eggs and yellow marshmallow Peeps, and brace yourself for what’s coming.
Your hissed commands, negotiation, and desperate attempt to make it stop are no match for your child’s screams. There’s kicking. Then they collapse and proceed to have a full-on meltdown on the floor.
It’s been like this for a while now. No matter what you do, the tantrums and adverse behavior are getting worse.
You have a sneaking suspicion that there may be more to it and have considered getting your kiddo a psychological evaluation, but therapy for children? You’re just… not sure.
Here’s what you need to know: Early intervention is crucial for kids who exhibit challenges with social and emotional issues. While it can be tempting to hope they’ll simply grow out of it, certain behavioral issues rarely get better on their own. The longer a child is left without learning the proper way to manage, the more damage it can do.
What Actually Happens in Couples Therapy?
You’ve been trying. You really have. You’ve read the articles about “active listening.” You’ve attempted calm-voice conversations after the kids go to bed. Maybe you even bought a relationship book or two—and one of you actually read it. You’ve though about couples therapy.
But here you are. Still stuck. Still having some version of the same frustrating conversation. Still lying in bed, wondering if your partner even gets you anymore.
And yet the idea of sitting on a couch with a stranger and talking about your relationship? That feels… intimidating. Maybe even a little embarrassing. Shouldn’t two smart, capable adults be able to work this out on their own?
Here’s what we tell couples who come to us at The Relationship Therapy Center in Fair Oaks and Roseville: the fact that you’ve been trying so hard is actually a great sign. It means you care. It means the motivation is there. What’s usually missing isn’t effort—it’s the right tools and a trained guide who can see patterns you can’t see from inside the relationship.
If you’ve been wondering what couples therapy and marriage counseling actually look like—what you’d walk into, what you’d be asked to do, and whether it’s really worth the time—this post is for you. Let’s pull back the curtain.
How Do You Release Trauma Stored in Your Body?
The reason traumatic events pack such a powerful punch boils down to survival. Back in the day, anyone who was blasé about tigers and other threats didn’t last very long.
Our brains are wired to obsess over a traumatic event because it thinks our survival depends on it. The clearer you remember the terrifying aspects of the event, the less likely you are to go through the same experience again.
The results of this are twofold: your mind obsesses over the event as if it happened yesterday, and your body reacts. You can feel your heart rate escalate as you replay the situation in your mind. You begin avoiding situations that bear even the slightest resemblance to the traumatic event. If you were in a car accident, your brain will clang the warning bells if you even think of merging onto that freeway again. Because of this, you avoid freeways entirely.
When your body reacts, it triggers your mind, and images of the event or similar scenarios flood your brain. This triggers your body. This cycle can repeat indefinitely until you learn how to move through the trauma and release it.
But how, right? This seems like a pretty complicated process.
Here are some techniques that will help you release pent-up trauma that is stored in your body.
Can Couples Therapy Help if We’re Not Sure We Want to Stay Together?
It’s no secret that an affair will rock a marriage, but indifference can damage your union too. No matter what the circumstances are that resulted in a wedge forming between the two of you, couples counseling is key to moving forward. Whether that be together or on your own.
Therapy is the best way for those who are unsure about the future of their relationship to make a well-informed decision. Here’s how couples counseling can help you figure out what you want to do.
How Do We Know If Our Communication Is “Bad Enough” to Need Couples Therapy?
If you’re Googling whether your communication problems are “bad enough” for therapy, here’s the honest answer: you’re probably ready.
Most couples wait too long. They tell themselves it’s not that serious, that all couples fight, that they should be able to figure it out on their own. By the time they finally reach out, resentment has built up for years—and the work is that much harder.
At The Relationship Therapy Center, we’ve seen this pattern hundreds of times across our Roseville and Fair Oaks offices. Couples therapy and marriage counseling work best when you start before things get desperate.
How to Heal Past Hurts in a Relationship (When You Can’t Let It Go)
You’ve tried to move on. Maybe you’ve even told yourself it shouldn’t still bother you. But something that happened—months ago, years ago—keeps coming back. A comment during a fight. A betrayal of trust. A moment when you needed your partner, and they weren’t there.
If you can’t let go of a past hurt in your relationship, there’s usually a reason. And it’s not because you’re “too sensitive” or holding a grudge. It’s because something important was never fully repaired.
At The Relationship Therapy Center in Fair Oaks and Roseville, couples therapy and marriage counseling often involve helping couples finally heal wounds that have been festering—sometimes for years.
Can a Marriage Counselor Save a Marriage?
You’re reeling after realizing the extent of the denial you’ve been in for, oh, at least 6 years. It hit you on your commute to work: this is your...
Can Couples Therapy Help If We’re Not Sure We Even Want to Stay Together?
If you’re not sure whether you want to stay in your marriage, couples therapy can still help—maybe even especially then.
Here’s something that might surprise you: a “successful” outcome in couples therapy doesn’t always mean staying together. Sometimes it means finally getting the clarity you need to make a decision—one way or the other—with support instead of reactivity.
At The Relationship Therapy Center in Roseville and Fair Oaks, we regularly work with couples across the Sacramento area who are unsure about their future. Couples therapy and marriage counseling aren’t just for couples who’ve already decided to stay. It’s for couples who need help figuring out what’s next.
What Are the Most Common Problems Addressed in Marriage Counseling or Couples Therapy?
If you’re wondering whether your relationship problems are “bad enough” for therapy—or if other couples even deal with the same things—you’re not alone. At The Relationship Therapy Center, we’ve worked with hundreds of couples across Roseville, Fair Oaks, and the greater Sacramento area. And while every relationship is unique, the patterns that bring couples through our doors are remarkably consistent.
Here’s what we’ve learned: couples often think they’re fighting about the surface issue—money, chores, parenting, sex. But the real problem is usually the relationship dynamic underneath. Patterns that erode safety, friendship, trust, and connection over time. That’s what couples therapy and marriage counseling actually address.
Is Our Communication Bad Enough for Therapy?
As humans, we’re pretty adaptable. Adaptability is a good trait to have when you’re doing, let’s say, a home renovation. You don’t have a working kitchen and are having to take showers at the gym, but you’re flexible enough to make it work, albeit temporarily.
Adaptability is not so good when your relationship starts to slip, and rather than say, ‘hey, wait a minute, let’s fix this,’ you adapt by letting a state of constant bickering or not connecting becomes your new normal.
If you’re someone who thinks couples therapy is only for infidelity or “serious” issues, let this serve as a wakeup call: Many divorces occur due to a lack of communication and other seemingly innocuous issues that accumulate over time.
Here are some common indicators that your communication (or lack thereof) is slowly destroying your relationship.
How do I find a good couples therapist?
You’ve decided to try couples therapy—but now you’re staring at a list of names with no idea how to tell the difference between them. In California alone, there are thousands of licensed therapists who list “couples” as a specialty. But not all couples therapists are created equal.
At The Relationship Therapy Center, we hear this all the time: “You’re our third couples therapist.” The first two taught “I statements”—and they’re still fighting. If that’s been your experience (or your fear), you’re not being picky. You’re being smart. Finding the right therapist matters, and this guide will help you know what to look for—without needing a PhD in therapy acronyms.
Reach out to start your healing journey today