Can you imagine if it was only socially acceptable for women to get treatment for cancer? Like, treatment was available to men, but there was so much societal stigma around it that most men just went with the status quo, and never sought medical intervention?
Unfortunately, this is how it still kind of is when it comes to men and mental health treatment: It’s currently much more “acceptable” for women to share emotions and discuss feelings than it is for men.
Hence the statistics around men’s mental health, which are pretty bleak. Suicide rates in males are 4 times what they are in females.
June is men’s health month, and as most of us already know, mental health is a huge determining factor in overall health. Here we’ll touch on the issues that arise when mental health goes unaddressed, and some ways we can all help to break down the stigma so that everyone who needs therapy can participate, without any feelings of shame.
The Danger of Not Processing Feelings
If you actually break it down, it’s pretty silly. Why are feelings—a big part of what it means to be a human—only traditionally “acceptable” for women to share and display?
One of the most damaging aspects of this message is that some men lose touch with their feelings altogether. Their default emotion may be anger, yet they don’t even know why they’re angry. They’ve lost touch with the emotion the anger is filling in for.
The result of not processing, exploring, or even understanding feelings leads to being emotionally devoid and unavailable, and living an unbalanced unfulfilling life.
The Burden of Unprocessed Feelings
Shouldering unprocessed feelings and thoughts can become too much of a burden for some.
The tragedy in this lies in the fact that nothing—nothing—is beyond the reach of hope and healing.
Just like a garage stacked with haphazard boxes, tools, and all sorts of random junk, the task of organizing it and purging what’s no longer needed can feel completely overwhelming. It’s tempting to just close the door and ignore it all.
But, if the project is started, bit by bit, order is restored. Useless unwanted or broken items are disposed of properly. Like-items are neatly stacked together, the floor is swept, and now there’s space to park the car.
Mental health is somewhat similar. On the face of it, sometimes what’s going on may seem so overwhelming that it’s tempting to shut the proverbial garage door.
However, box by box, issue by issue, one traumatic incident or limiting self-belief at a time, it’s all dragged out into the light. There it can get sorted and worked through accordingly.
How We Can Help
In a quest to continue to erode the stigma surrounding men and mental health, it’s important we teach children of all genders the role feelings play in the overall human experience.
Kids should not be punished for feelings, or encouraged to “suck it up.” By labeling feelings and understanding why they’re there, children learn to connect with themselves and their needs, and express them appropriately.
The sad truth is, when adults don’t understand their own feelings, they are unable to properly teach their kids about the deeper, more complex emotions.
For those in a relationship or who have close male friends, it’s vital to be open and supportive when they choose to be vulnerable and share how they fee
Encourage them to be open. Ask questions, and listen.
Let’s continue to put a stop to these silly outdated stereotypes. We only get one shot at this incredible life, and all of us should be given the chance to freely experience the depth of what it means to be a human.
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Other Services Offered at The Relationship Therapy Center in California:
In addition to Individual therapy for adults Our Sacramento area counseling clinics located in Roseville and Fair Oaks, CA are pleased to offer a variety of mental health services. Our couples services include: Counseling after infidelity, sex therapy, co-parent counseling, family therapy, divorce counseling, intensive couples retreats, and premarital counseling. Our individual therapy services include, therapy for children, teen therapy, depression treatment, and individual relationship counseling. Our therapists offer online counseling in California to treat a variety of mental health concerns. Please reach out to our Sacramento area therapy office to learn more about the many ways we can help you or your loved ones heal and grow.